Friday, February 11, 2005
The Universal Soldier
I'm hesitant to even write this entry because it's such a beautiful day outside, I'm in such a wonderful mood, and there are so many positive things that I could write about. But maybe that's exactly why I need to write it.
I was visiting a friend the other day, and I had the opportunity to spend some time in the presence of her three year old son. When he brought out some Lincoln Logs for us to play with, he seemed to have more fun smashing my half-finished creations than building any log cabins of his own. But this is par for the course, especially for someone his age. He's a very energetic and creative little kid, and I usually find his antics amusing. In fact, I've had to stifle my laughter more than once as he did something naughty that didn't hurt anybody, but that isn't the sort of behavior you want to encourage in a three year old. He's also growing so fast, to the point where he's starting to think about his own identity separate from his parents, the nature of life and death, etc. So, it was a joy to see him again, if only in passing.
But then, something happened that I found very disturbing.
He likes to pick up random objects and pretend that they're guns. That's always been somewhat disturbing to me, and I suspect that it has been to his mother too. He watches very little if any television, so I'm not even sure where he gets some of these behaviors. But, it's a very common thing for kids in our culture to do, especially young boys. So, I've grown used to it.
On that day, though, he did something related to guns that I found unexpectedly chilling.
He had a bunch of Legos put together in the shape of a long tower that he was using as a toy gun. At first, he was making silly gun noises and playfully shooting the gun at unseen "monsters." But then, for a moment, he adopted a very serious demeanor. He held the Lego gun close to his chest, with his hand on the barrel higher than his trigger hand, leaving the gun slanted across his chest at an angle like so many soldiers and swat team members in the movies do. Then, he put his back flat against the wall and peaked over his right shoulder as if looking into his bedroom for his target. Finally, he spun around, pushed the door open, and went into his bedroom with his toy gun blazing.
I don't know... this may seem like such a simple and common occurence to parents raising young boys who have grown up on television and PlayStation. But somehow, this little "raid" struck me as deeply disturbing. I didn't have much time to think about it in the moment because my friends and I were getting ready to go somewhere that night. But it definitely caught my eye, and in retrospect I can understand why.
Among other things, it instantly summoned to mind my teenage cousin who's currently serving in Iraq. I almost never got to see this cousin except at Christmas and Thanksgiving, so it's not as though we were the closest of friends. But I saw him grow up from infancy to young adulthood, and I can remember the hundreds of times that I watched him play and sometimes played with him. He's my cousin, and when it comes down to it, I really do care about him. So, I hope that he makes it home in one piece, and hope that he makes it home without having endured much harm -- or done much harm.
Somehow, as I watched my three year old friend play-act an armed raid, my mind and heart were drawn through space and time into the experiences of a thousand soldiers. I thought about the growth of my cousin from child to soldier, the realities of war in the world today, the fact that all of the brutal men on all sides of today's conflicts [and most ARE men] were at one point infants in the arms of their mothers, and so on. As I mentioned, I didn't have time to explore this experience more deeply in the moment because I had places to go and people to see. But it was an oddly memorable moment that I suspect will stick with me for the rest of my life.
It leaves me with even more of a heavy heart to think that my friend's son may one day become a soldier. My friends are very close to me, and as a child of my friend, this little boy is like family to me. I just can't bear the thought of him ever going away to join the military. I couldn't stand to see him receive and dole out the sort of harm that such a course of events would entail. He doesn't deserve to be tossed into a world where young boys are the tools of a war machine. He's only a child -- and yet somewhere, some adult in his life has already introduced this archetype of the soldier into his consciousness through television, movies, the games that other children play, and so on. I would lay down my life to keep him safe from harm. And I would give anything to insure that he won't have to grow up in a world where such games of childhood become the reality of adulthood. But I can't -- so even in his otherwise innocent moments of play by himself, he is entering into the wild wild world of adults that awaits him sooner than I'd care to admit.
On a brighter note, he's still just a little boy, and he's still got a lot of learning to do. He has two parents who love him dearly, and knowing his mother as well as I do, I'm sure that he will come into his own in a good environment, empowering him to become a wonderful adult human being. Here's to the hope that by the time he IS an adult, we'll have made some progress in the creation of a world of greater peace, greater justice, and greater freedom. Maybe then, as he watches his own children play together, none of them will be turning Legos into guns...
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I was visiting a friend the other day, and I had the opportunity to spend some time in the presence of her three year old son. When he brought out some Lincoln Logs for us to play with, he seemed to have more fun smashing my half-finished creations than building any log cabins of his own. But this is par for the course, especially for someone his age. He's a very energetic and creative little kid, and I usually find his antics amusing. In fact, I've had to stifle my laughter more than once as he did something naughty that didn't hurt anybody, but that isn't the sort of behavior you want to encourage in a three year old. He's also growing so fast, to the point where he's starting to think about his own identity separate from his parents, the nature of life and death, etc. So, it was a joy to see him again, if only in passing.
But then, something happened that I found very disturbing.
He likes to pick up random objects and pretend that they're guns. That's always been somewhat disturbing to me, and I suspect that it has been to his mother too. He watches very little if any television, so I'm not even sure where he gets some of these behaviors. But, it's a very common thing for kids in our culture to do, especially young boys. So, I've grown used to it.
On that day, though, he did something related to guns that I found unexpectedly chilling.
He had a bunch of Legos put together in the shape of a long tower that he was using as a toy gun. At first, he was making silly gun noises and playfully shooting the gun at unseen "monsters." But then, for a moment, he adopted a very serious demeanor. He held the Lego gun close to his chest, with his hand on the barrel higher than his trigger hand, leaving the gun slanted across his chest at an angle like so many soldiers and swat team members in the movies do. Then, he put his back flat against the wall and peaked over his right shoulder as if looking into his bedroom for his target. Finally, he spun around, pushed the door open, and went into his bedroom with his toy gun blazing.
I don't know... this may seem like such a simple and common occurence to parents raising young boys who have grown up on television and PlayStation. But somehow, this little "raid" struck me as deeply disturbing. I didn't have much time to think about it in the moment because my friends and I were getting ready to go somewhere that night. But it definitely caught my eye, and in retrospect I can understand why.
Among other things, it instantly summoned to mind my teenage cousin who's currently serving in Iraq. I almost never got to see this cousin except at Christmas and Thanksgiving, so it's not as though we were the closest of friends. But I saw him grow up from infancy to young adulthood, and I can remember the hundreds of times that I watched him play and sometimes played with him. He's my cousin, and when it comes down to it, I really do care about him. So, I hope that he makes it home in one piece, and hope that he makes it home without having endured much harm -- or done much harm.
Somehow, as I watched my three year old friend play-act an armed raid, my mind and heart were drawn through space and time into the experiences of a thousand soldiers. I thought about the growth of my cousin from child to soldier, the realities of war in the world today, the fact that all of the brutal men on all sides of today's conflicts [and most ARE men] were at one point infants in the arms of their mothers, and so on. As I mentioned, I didn't have time to explore this experience more deeply in the moment because I had places to go and people to see. But it was an oddly memorable moment that I suspect will stick with me for the rest of my life.
It leaves me with even more of a heavy heart to think that my friend's son may one day become a soldier. My friends are very close to me, and as a child of my friend, this little boy is like family to me. I just can't bear the thought of him ever going away to join the military. I couldn't stand to see him receive and dole out the sort of harm that such a course of events would entail. He doesn't deserve to be tossed into a world where young boys are the tools of a war machine. He's only a child -- and yet somewhere, some adult in his life has already introduced this archetype of the soldier into his consciousness through television, movies, the games that other children play, and so on. I would lay down my life to keep him safe from harm. And I would give anything to insure that he won't have to grow up in a world where such games of childhood become the reality of adulthood. But I can't -- so even in his otherwise innocent moments of play by himself, he is entering into the wild wild world of adults that awaits him sooner than I'd care to admit.
On a brighter note, he's still just a little boy, and he's still got a lot of learning to do. He has two parents who love him dearly, and knowing his mother as well as I do, I'm sure that he will come into his own in a good environment, empowering him to become a wonderful adult human being. Here's to the hope that by the time he IS an adult, we'll have made some progress in the creation of a world of greater peace, greater justice, and greater freedom. Maybe then, as he watches his own children play together, none of them will be turning Legos into guns...
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